Most of my old friends and I'm talking here about friends from Romania, or friends who spent most of their life in Romania, start questioning me "why are you doing that?", "why don't you do this on a different way?", "why did you move there?" and the list of WHY questions can go on and on... I had this idea with a blog for a while and I'm doing this mostly for myself, as a way to look back and see what was in my mind in that moment and how I judged everything in that particular moment. It might help also and see where I was worng. I'm not going to put any name here, at least not on this topic, but I'm sure will help me to see how WRONG or RIGHT I was in this particular moment, maybe will prevent me of making the same mistakes in the future. Who knows?
It was a custom thing last century 'till the late 90's, that all of us has to follow our parents pattern. But is that the right way? Is that the path which bring at the end happiness? Did our ancestors follow the right path? My opinion is NO. It's true, we got way more choices than our parents, for sure our children's will have few extra choices compared with what we had or have now. Our parents, grandparents, friends, neighbors or even the whole community had a single pattern, of course with few exceptions.
Getting back why I wrote NO: if our parents had the right pattern, I'm sure we/they would have followed exactly the same pattern as our grandparents had, of course the chain can go back thousands of years. For some, happiness is just a little house, a wife and few kids. For others, happiness means just a wife, no house, no kids, no responsibilities. And there are thousands of different answers so... I'm going to stop looking for this answer. We are all happy in our way, sometimes I realize that 4 years ago I was happier than in that moment, but 5 years ago I had more sadness than today. It depends also how we see the future... but every day it's the first day of the rest our life, I guess we have to enjoy and focus on what we do, on every moment, no matter if we are at work, at school, driving, on the train, at home... being sad today it's not a guarantee that tomorrow I will be happier, but being happy today guarantee that tomorrow I have a nice memory from yesterday.
We have to make ourselves happy first, but our happiness doesn't have to relay on anyone's sadness. I didn't thought about this before, but giving my pattern to someone because that pattern works for me, doesn't mean that pattern will make someone else happy or will work on his/her case. I loved to travel since I was 6 or 7, and proudly say that I was blessed enough to see a good part of this world and I know, there's always place for more :-), but for some, travel it's just a nightmare. If X loves to be a mechanic, X doesn't come to me and say: you should be a mechanic too! of course, the list can go ... and about me being blessed to work, live and spend time with people who were more than I deserved or deserve now it's not a grant that I should always receive. We/I should be a blessing at least the same way for them, for the ones who are around us. I'm sure that we will always receive back our kindness :-).
WHY should go away from my vocabulary in many contexts, because my way is not the right way! It might be the right way for me and for maybe one more person of the other 6.5 billions.
Enough for today!
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it. ~Andy Rooney
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